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Monday, August 21, 2006

i went to visit my brother this afternoon. with typical forgetfullness i, um, forgot why i went there. instead i handed him some gifts for his kids (who weren't home yet) that i bought while in borneo.

one of the co-owners in our racebike lost his mum the other day. she was a couple of years younger than my mum, in good health, and something just snuck up and got her.

it's a bit depressing. i didn't know her, but a death that touches a friend kind of touches you too i think. it also serves to remind me why i am here.

some people are put on the earth to achieve great things, write great music, erect tall buildings, design great motorcycles, invent sewerage and clean water so i don't have to worry about them. you get the point. as far as i can work out, i'm here to have fun, which hopefully won't come back to haunt me in another life. i'm not religious. after working out that i'm not a christian i touched briefly on buddhism and islam and played with tarot cards and astrology. and i worked out that none of it interests me in the slightest.

the coolest thing about having a set of tarot cards was that i had a cool set of tarot cards. i didn't feel compelled (nor did i show any aptitude) to solve the mysteries of the universe, mankind, or even my own future.

i'm good at my job (well i was until i took a step up the ladder, now i'm overwhelmed and under motivated), i earn good money (i think) and my life is comfortable. got two kids who i love, a family of kooky people who i also love, and a wierd and diverse circle of friends.

some religions talk about a heaven, well i reckon i'm in it. sure there's crappy bits, and i hate them, but i also like the good bits and i cherish them. the only reason i'm still doing my job is so i can afford to buy my toys, ride our bike, and go on holidays. it's been too long between cool holidays like the one i just had. i'm already planning for the next. i don't have the balls to follow the Leyland Brothers (sorry, i tried to find a link, but these guys were pre internet and the results i got were way to pathetic a tribute to them), nor even the thousands and thousands of carefree backpackers of all nationalities who walk the globe.

i think i like to do my job, carve out my little bit of materialistic errr stuff, and take a couple of weeks out per year doing something really cool. although having a weekend job on a diveboat really is a great stress relief. another thing i like, apart from scuba diving in exotic locations, is meeting people. i think i like meeting people so much because i have such pathetic people skills. i love to meet new people, find out about their lives, learn how to ask for a beer in a new language, and generally fit in, wherever i go.

i was nearly going to go on a trip to europe next year with a couple of my mates, following the gp circus for a few races. it sounded pretty good to me, but i can't afford it. for the amount of money it was going to cost, i could do 3 of the holidays i just had. one of my mates who is still going to go seemed determined to set me up with every stray chicky he found. i can't work out whether he wants to do this (tried a few times in the past and always pushing) because he's now married with kids and used to be very good at meeting cute chickies and jumping in the sack with them, or because he just loves embarrassing the shit out of me. he goes on and on about how easy it is, and a whole bunch of other stuff, maybe i'm not hot-blooded enough. but i kinda don't work that way. don't get me wrong, i like looking at cute chickies, every now and then i find myself romantically involved (usually with disasterous consequences) but i'm kinda over it.

well anyway, i know what i like and what i don't. i'm gonna enjoy what i do and savour a few pleasant experiences along the way.

anyway, i've rambled from place to place about as badly as usual, so i'll try and cut to a point,
"When you reach the end of your life, the point is not to arrive looking rested and refined, but to slide in sideways saying, 'Wow, what a ride!'"

my friend's mum i think certainly had a full life. family, friends, travel. she'll be missed

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