Monday, February 07, 2005
an old and stupid game
i like confusing the people who ring me. answer the phone with the russian word for hi (priviyet). or say "mortuary spare parts" or "ballina taxis".
anyone who knows me probably recognises my voice, but they are still confused. and confusion is good. maybe that's why i work in computers. for something that is supposed to be so logical and sensible, they can be almost as illogical as a smart woman can be, when she chooses. with computers logic will sometimes work, and then, sometimes jumping to conclusions works as well.
unfortunately, there the analogy breaks down. any analogy applied to a woman's behaviour is doomed to failure. just pull your hair out and be done with it.
back to my stupid phone answering. tonight i had an unexpected bonus. phone rings. probably mum, or dad, or me bro. so i pick it up. "goulburn taxis" i say. "oh sorry, wrong number, thanks, bye." says the telemarketer. hmmm, how interesting. of course they will end any call where they aren't getting anywhere as quickly as possible. until now my aim was to wear them out, waste their stupid telemarketing time without a sale.
but now i have a new idea. if i can convince everyone i know, and those i don't, to answer the phone "ballina taxis". it'll fuck them all up. ok, sure they'll work it out sooner or later. and still be the frikken pests that they are. but just think. some marketing pain in the arse, who thinks it's ok to annoy a whole bunch of people to make A sale, might just realise how many sales he or she is driving away. charities might realise that they are now blacklisted due to being pains in the arse. but then, maybe they'll just change their tactics. but as long as it annoys the fuckers my mission is done. because they annoy the living shit out of me.
i'm always up for new ways to torture telemarketers
i like confusing the people who ring me. answer the phone with the russian word for hi (priviyet). or say "mortuary spare parts" or "ballina taxis".
anyone who knows me probably recognises my voice, but they are still confused. and confusion is good. maybe that's why i work in computers. for something that is supposed to be so logical and sensible, they can be almost as illogical as a smart woman can be, when she chooses. with computers logic will sometimes work, and then, sometimes jumping to conclusions works as well.
unfortunately, there the analogy breaks down. any analogy applied to a woman's behaviour is doomed to failure. just pull your hair out and be done with it.
back to my stupid phone answering. tonight i had an unexpected bonus. phone rings. probably mum, or dad, or me bro. so i pick it up. "goulburn taxis" i say. "oh sorry, wrong number, thanks, bye." says the telemarketer. hmmm, how interesting. of course they will end any call where they aren't getting anywhere as quickly as possible. until now my aim was to wear them out, waste their stupid telemarketing time without a sale.
but now i have a new idea. if i can convince everyone i know, and those i don't, to answer the phone "ballina taxis". it'll fuck them all up. ok, sure they'll work it out sooner or later. and still be the frikken pests that they are. but just think. some marketing pain in the arse, who thinks it's ok to annoy a whole bunch of people to make A sale, might just realise how many sales he or she is driving away. charities might realise that they are now blacklisted due to being pains in the arse. but then, maybe they'll just change their tactics. but as long as it annoys the fuckers my mission is done. because they annoy the living shit out of me.
i'm always up for new ways to torture telemarketers
