Wednesday, July 21, 2004

hmmmmm beeerrrrrrr

well Jonas has inspired me to write about my favourite topic. beer.
unlike his five favourite nites on the piss i'll instead mention my "days of the week on the piss"

typically a painful day, usually with a hangover courtesy of the meat raffle at the rsl club on sunday, well courtesy of the meat raffle and not wanting to stop once getting home. one good beer deserves another!
by the end of monday i'm usually looking for solace, and where better than in a bottle of tooheys new or resch's pilsner.

ok, probably have found my feet by now, unless i needed a lot of solace last night. but i wouldn't mind a couple of quiet beers and an early night.

wednesday (humpday)
usually squash with the grot, followed by soccer training. tonight is fitness night. after trashing myself trying to keep up with the younger players (which is everyone on the damn team) i wouldn't mind a beer or 3 to take my mind off the pain. payday today!
humpday means it's all downhill for the rest of the week, and what better way to send me on my way than a coupla beers.

usually over 35's soccer tonight. these guys are well organised. always beer available for enjoying after the game. the half time talk is pretty good as well. i remember the first week i played, at half time someone started talking about soccer, fortunately someone else told him to shut up. "fuck talking about soccer, tell us about what roots you've had instead!". after this inspiring team talk we went on to turn the game around and from 3-1 down we won 5-3.

soccer training again, this is usually skill training. and seeing as we play on saturday, i'm in full bludge mode. i usually have the kids on friday night anyway, so if i possibly can, i won't turn up at all. but if i do that then i'll probably only get to play a half game on saturday.
after this it's dinner and a vid with the kids. i keep promising myself to stay sober on friday nights to see if i have any more energy on saturdays. haven't found out yet.....

the big day. sleep in, (or during the summer nick to the beach with the kids for a surf) then get ready for soccer. if i haven't been to training this week, or maybe just missed friday night, then i'll probably only get half a game. which really sucks. i wouldn't mind if they took me off at half time, but they usually don't let me start until halftime. it takes me a good 15-35 mins to get started, so i'm still puffing like a steam train when the friggen game is finishing!
after the game i really feel like i need a beer. and if i'm not driving, then i've usually organised a coupla coldies then i'm ready for some intelligent barracking (har har de har). it's only a matter of time until i get sinbinned on the sideline. so far my saving grace is that after a coupla beers all you can hear is loud, unintelligble abuse, and no-one is really sure what i'm going on about anyway. which is for the best, i haven't got much of a clue really.
afterwards we'll probably head off to the local to celebrate our losses.

big big big sleep in, probably with a hangover. if i manage to drag my sorry arse out of bed before lunch, then it's round to mum's for a bbq lunch (breakfast) and maybe a couple of beers to get my liver to shut down, shut up, and generally stop making me feel so bad. afterwards down to the rsl for the meat raffle. i never even buy any tickets anymore, i'm just there for the beer. and to install a hangover for monday. mondays suck anyway, might as well feel bad from a hangover anyway.

might as well post my theme song:
by Homer J. Simpson.

DOUGH... the stuff...that buys me beer...
RAY..... the guy that sells me beer...
ME...... the guy... who drinks the beer
FAR..... the distance to my beer
SO...... I think I'll have a beer...
LA...... La la la la la la beer
TEA..... no thanks, I'm drinking beer...
That will bring us back to...(Looks into an empty glass)

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