Monday, May 31, 2004

monday again?

i'd never get a job in a newspaper, always got very lame headings.

i've discovered a way to make mondays a lot more fun though; get to work late.

the weekend on the boat was pretty good. stayed up way too late drinking on friday night, finally shut down the generator and went to bed at 2:00am. surprisingly i felt ok the next morning, and we had a pretty good day. i didn't manage to get any dives unfortunately, this group was a little too disorganised on saturday for me to have a change to get in myself. by the time the last diver would get in the water, the first diver would be getting out already.

saturday night was the fancy dress party. more drinking and loud music and generally having a fun time. an earlier night's sleep though. everyone was too tired from a big day of diving.

sunday was another fine day, a couple of different dives. the group doing the advanced course managed to finish all their tasks. we had to get some of them onboard, fill their tanks, and push them back in. unfortunately we gave them a bit too much air, they didn't want to get out of the water after they finish their course. so we told them it was their choice, they could stay in if they liked, but we're serving lunch now. suit yourself. (i had vision at this stage of not getting home until dark, and i had another date in sydney lined up, so i was a little less than enthusiastic about dawdling divers....)

we finally got everyone off and i jumped in the crapmobile and headed home, a quick shower and change, and off to sydney for dinner and a movie. crashed at a friend's house afterwards and drove home in the morning. and with my usual lazy relucance to get out of bed on a monday morning, i didn't want to get up. so i got to work nice and late.

picked up a few things from home on the way past, the local reject-fm was on the radio. they said anyone who wanted some tickets to the local "australian idle" grand opening concert should stop by the railway station and pick them up. i know my sister-in-law would like them so i got them on the way past. i'd rather stab myself with a fork than go myself. same pain but doesn't last as long.

at work just in time for morning tea! :-)
(and yes still on a high. even monday can't bring me down today)

Friday, May 28, 2004

today's excuse

can't think of anything exciting to write today. playing with the bofh excuse generator. i think i can work with this: "your excuse: new guy cross-connected phone lines with ac power bus." that'll keep me amused for a while anyway.

on the boat tonight. our coolest group is on the boat this weekend. Dive2000. got a fancy dress party saturday night, just in case we actually needed an excuse to drink too much and behave like idiots :-). the theme is masks for males and feathers for females. could be interesting...

sunday is going to be a big day. unpack the boat and get the customers off, then get myself home and tidied up into some kind of presentable image, before i drive to sydney for dinner. i have a funny feeling i'll be my usual tired and gibbering self on monday. hehehe monday, day of hangovers! i hate mondays anyway, might as well have a good reason.

Wednesday, May 26, 2004

still flyin...

i'm still on a high. being the pessimist that i am, (ok, yes, or being eeyore) i'm sure i will screw it all up and then i'll be back to normal. but i don't give a shit. i'm riding the wave while i can.

life's full of up's and down. i've hit them all. as Jonas has so eloquently described, if some fuckwit who earns about $150K can still be unhappy, i reckon i can be happy with my little world.

when you're down, sure, you feel like shit. don't get me wrong dudes/dudettes, i feel your pain, just gotta ride it out and wait for it to swing back. it won't last forever. and really, there's nothing anyone can say to you to bring you up. a hug from your mum/friends/siblings/lovers can help, if you let it.

big hugs to MissJenJen and Pixelkitty by the way, who are both going through some crappy shit. ride it out ladies, i know you can do it.

and when you're up (ok, got there finally) it's just fucken fantastic. it's like when i go surfing and catch a wave and you're cruising down the face and turning so hard you can hold yourself up by dragging your hand in the water. (and just amazed that i didn't screw it up) like being on your bike on a crisp autumn night, with a full moon, cruising along the side of lake george at, well ok, about double the speed limit (sorry Daniel)
well i think you get the picture. and for me, it also includes spending time with a really cool, snarky, wicked sense of humour, attractive (because i'm a shallow prick), smart (well smarter than me, but that's not saying much), vivacious and totally outoing lady. (ok yes, suck suck suck, so sue me, i'm going with the moment :-p)

ok the last bit is fairly unusual for me, but i think you get the picture. what i was trying to say is: when you're up, you don't know how long it's gonna last. maybe tomorrow there'll be some poxy tragedy in your life. i've been to funerals for people younger than me who've had heart attacks. fuck waiting for the golden moment. when i'm having fun, i'm gonna milk it for all it's worth. i'm not here to play politics or build bridges or paint great works of art.

for this life, i just want to savour the magical experiences.

Tuesday, May 25, 2004

one perfect day

have you ever had one of those days where everything just worked?

i used to have really shitty timing, but now, i don't give a shit, and it all seems to just work, and i love it. well, ok, the timing is good. i have yet to see how everything else will work.

today was one of those perfect, zen days... i had a fun date last night. and i managed, by a complete fluke, not to make a complete idiot of myself. or perhaps she got a giggle out of that, because today she rang up and asked if i wanted to meet for coffee. ok, i pretended not to be too excited and said yes :-)

the crossword over brekkie, lunch at a pub, late back, but everything turned out ok. everything else i had organised for the day magically disappeared.

cruising home in my sister's mgb, when i got to wollongong, i had the urge to take the top off. ok, it's overcast and dark, but it's not raining and it sounded like a fun idea at the time. by the time i get home, i'm on a high again.

the only way to fly :-)

Friday, May 21, 2004

brain fart

stupid stupid stupid, i hate it when i do stupid stuff

the power steering in the crapmobile has been moaning at me for the last few days (low fluid) so i thought i'd do the right thing and top it up. only i had a complete frikken brain fart and put in brake fluid instead. fucken fuck fuck fuck!

when i bought the brake fluid, and was putting it in, i couldn't work out what was wrong. it was like one of those scenes where something glaringly obvious is out of place, but you can't work out what it is. until you're driving back to work and you get that sinking feeling when you realise you've fucked up.

so it's over at the mechanics. might as well get a service while it's there. i'll see it again monday arvo, maybe.

oh well i don't need a car this weekend. i'm on the boat. packed and ready to go. i just need some seasickness tablets so i don't get sick when i'm doing the vacuuming!

avagoodweekend everybody!

friday!! woohoo

we won at soccer last night, not through playing any good, but because we had 4 subs, and they had none. they were winning 3-1 until about 15 minutes to go, then they ran out of puff. and we ran all over them and won 5-3.

although (coincidence?) when i subbed off we started scoring. there could be a moral to the story there. i was prepared after the game this time, a towel so i could have a hot shower afterwards, and hang around for a few beers. when i play soccer on the weekend we aren't very organised. no-one usually brings any beer (ok, except me) and how can you be properly expected to hurl drunken abuse at the game if you haven't had a few quiet beers to charge you up?

the over 35's on the other hand are very organised. enough beer for both teams :-) i'm starting to really get into this. pity i started doing it for fitness. i've a funny feeling that beers after the game isn't the best training for the weekend!

now i've just got to survive friday (yes, i'm in my cube farm, watching the clock tick over while abusing the fair use internet policy)

Wednesday, May 19, 2004

c'est la vie

i think thats french for "shit happens"

oh well. looks like i made myself too obvious and now she knows i'm interested, but she's not. drat. oh well, i'm not gonna sulk too much. just wallow in a bit more self pity and go back to pretending to be a real adult.

back to work reality, just moved desks, and i've finally moved my entire old mess to the new location. i'm not looking forward to sorting out the new mess though. i threw out about enough crap to fill a wheelie bin yesterday, more today with a bit of luck.

i don't feel like working really, and the boss keeps on sneaking past when i least expect it. like i'm meant to be working and stuff! i've just about run out of weekend work. only a few more weekends and it'll be all over for a few months. then it's very quiet until october-november. i've just gotta remember to be good. no overspending on saturday nights after the soccer :-)

Sunday, May 16, 2004

beer scooters

ok that was a good night, i think. i've just woken up at 11:00. i my grandmother's clock bonging away and was surprised when it got up to 11, so i thought i'd better get out of bed.

i was sitting down after getting home last night, wondering, "just how the fuck did i get here?" musta got them beer scooters. ok, i probably walked, seeing as i live only a few blocks from the pub, but i don't remember any of it.

fortunately i don't remember doing karaoke or being a pissed idiot either.... much..... doh!

Friday, May 14, 2004

friday, i'm over it. hmmmmm beeerrrrrr

thank fuck that is over. for a while i thought friday was shaping up to be like thursday was.

i have found the universal truth. after lunch at the pub, everything is better.

the weekend on the boat is cancelled (surf's up dudes). much as i enjoy my weekend work, i don't mind a little time out and a chance to catch up. and beer is good.

finished switching isp's, only broke one or two things that i can see so far, and i don't give a shit. they can wait until monday. the first 2-3 people i asked to see how the new connection was going said it was doing wierd things and a bit slower. so i'm going fuckfuckfuckfucknowwhat! but it seems.... like its going ok and a bit faster now, maybe. monday shall reveal all (including me cowering under my desk gibbering). you really should see how our firewalls and internet connection are setup. chicken-wire, chewing gum, duct tape.... only not visible, ok, yes, the rack looks like a blue spaghetti explosion, but the bodged up bits are how the routes and other network settings have been done. i'm fucken amazed it works at all.

stupid backup software screwed up as well, so after soccer training i went back to work to unscrew it. i finally escaped at around 10:30. i've gotta sort this shit out. i mean, overtime is nice. but weekends (that's friday 4:00pm till sunday pass-out time) are not for working.

after work i decided i needed some timeout. grab the mgb (and a jumper and a beannie) and i'm off to see how the surf looks in jervis bay. there must be over 200 guys surfing (no, not all at the same break, about 5-6 different breaks, it's everywhere man) still, and it's 5:00pm. ok, lots and lots of esky lids out there, but a lot of boards as well. i think it's high tide, looks like it's just dropped off a little. crap this is a fun car, this engine just loves to spin. i've gotta stop grinning at people when i overtake them. i mean, you've gotta look over your shoulder to make sure you've got room to get in, but i seem to be always doing it with a big dopey grin. woohoo!

check out this mgb. this is the coolest. inspired me lots. i wanted to go for the supercharger option (as if i have an mgb anyway, it's sister and bro-in-laws), but this one, at over twice the engine size, and weighing less, has got to be good. looks exquisite if you ask me. and a v8 in a car that's like driving a rollerskate, it'd be like a dog on lino, slip slide and away.

universal truth number 2 - you can never have too much grunt.

enough shit for one day. don't panic. i'm not feeling negative. just a few days at work have put me in a snarky mood and i'm venting all my negative stuff. i don't really feel that bad, and, no, when i go for my dinner date, i won't be snarky or negative, ok?

guru josh - infinity (like the music, but jees man, get a better name, but then, maybe he was a one hit wonder or something. i'd look it up, but i don't give a shit)

Thursday, May 13, 2004

another bloody stupid thursday

i don't like thursdays. and today was a frikken 13 hour day of crap that i could do without. and yeah yeah yeah, it's not that long a day, but i'm in the public sector, i should be working 7 hour days and bludging at the expense of the ratepayers.

mc-crap on the way home, a few beers, and i'm gonna pass out. bring on friday and lunch at the pub. after that i'll make up for today and be useless for the rest of the day

i got some advice from a girl at work. she said ask this girl i like in out to dinner. then she'll know i'm interested. so now at least she knows i'm interested, and she said yes. i wonder how i can screw this up...

Wednesday, May 12, 2004

this is the title

another hump day, another payday. nothing exciting really. tried to re-write yesterday's deleted post, but i can't make it say what i want. it's just shit. i have this vague impression of what i want to say. but the text image that comes out, just ain't it.

goto 10
10: drink more
20: try write blog
30: read blog; if blog=blurry goto bed
40: read blog; if blot=shit, goto 10, else goto 60
50: goto 10
60: publish blog

still sore from climbing on monday night. i had a pretty good night, a lot better than i thought i would. all the bouldering walls have been changed since i was last there, and considering how out of form i am, i was pretty happy.

no soccer training tonight, it's too wet and no-one turned up. it's a pity because over 35 soccer has a bye tomorrow, and i'm on the boat this weekend, so no sport for me until i thrash myself climbing next monday night.

oh wow, now what the frikken hell do i do? there's this girl i'm chasin at the moment. she is really cool, cute, and fun to be with. being the socially retarded fuck that i am, i'm still working up to asking her out for dinner.

ok, back to my quandry. there's this other girl. she is totally cool too. she's a closet computer geek (can't hold that against her) but i've spent the last 1.5 hours chatting with her. she laughs at my jokes, she reads the bastard operator from hell, she's even heard of the excuse generator. i'd better stop, i think my sister is starting to worry about the maniacal laughter.

anyway, my quandry. i'm a fairly single minded guy when it comes to girls. but on the other side of the coin, knowing my luck, i'll tell one i'm interested in another, then the one i choose will say "tough luck" and i'll be walking my paddy malone again. is it naughty of me to try and keep both going until i work out what's gonna work?

'cause that's what i want to do. just be nice and talk to them both, and whichever one doesn't run for cover when i act my normal stupid self, i'm gonna try and move on.

why is it, that girls are so lovely and cute, desirable and cuddly, yet impossible?

shoot me now

Tuesday, May 11, 2004


what colour are your eyes? i look at them and i think blue, then i think silver, then something in between. then i think i shouldn't stare, because my brain stops. i have to wake myself up and make sure i'm not drooling or something. how much closer can we get without touching?

the whole time your eyes are flicking, i think maybe they are flicking from one of my eyes to the other, and occasionally down to see if i am still grinning.

who are you blue eyed girl? in the background my wheels are spinning. i can hear the noise of the rubber biting, it chirps, then i hear the exhaust roar, then the tyres squealing, but i'm not travelling anywhere. but then, i enjoy a good burnout. perhaps this is the fun bit. it is so magical, fun and new.

i must be so transparent i think. how can anyone watching fail to see this?

Sunday, May 09, 2004

a night in front of the telly

but wait there's more..... NOT. can it get any more boring than this?

woke up this morning and got the kids a few brownie points by making sure their mother's day present was there before their mum woke up. hope you appreciate this grots. had a brief look at the surf. surf's up dudes, pity it was dredging sand (low tide). went home, and wasted a bit of time before retrieving my car from my brother's (no cats this time) and checking out the surf elsewhere. same problem, dredging, try again at high tide. so round to mum's for the sunday bbq and a few beers.

watching serendipity. usually i'm a big fan of john cusack. loved "better off dead" and second to that was "grosse point blank". "pushing tin" was ok, sorta, but never to be watched again. (unlike the first two which i will re-watch every few months). i couldn't even get through the first 20 minutes of serendipity.

perhaps this relates to the fact that i can't watch people embarrass themselves on tv, because i am so good at embarrassing myself and i hate it. watching them screw up relationships killed if for me, because i associate with it all too well. i can't embarrass myself well, shop for relationships, or buy and sell cars. i'll have to ask my shrink about that if she's not reading this. but she'll probably tell me what i already know, that is i have screwed social skills.

hmmm, the imdb reminds shows a heap i've never heard of or seen, but reminds me of "con air", which was cool but more of a nicholas cage movie, and "hot pursuit" which was also good. oh shite, yeah, "the sure thing" another good movie. didn't rate so good, but i enjoyed it. although a bit predictable. (as if all of them weren't predictable!)

i wonder what crap movies are on tonight. i should get a life.... ah fuck it, why stop now just when i'm hating it :-) last night i kept myself awake with "the whole nine yards", always good for a giggle, and Natasha Henstridge is just beautiful (but ok, yeah, i only just looked up her name on the movie database thingy)

(disclaimer: just because i vent and write some stupid boring shit, doesn't mean my life is really exciting and spontaneous. my life really isn't exciting. this is just the shit i vent. it's all bullshit. not as exciting as the movies, just as stupid as real life.)

Saturday, May 08, 2004

happy mother's day

i hope all the mother's out there have a great day tomorrow (sunday). i've tried to tell my grots to do the right thing and look after their mum on mother's day. but they have managed to leave her present here (bought out of their pocket money) so probably they will stay in bed and do nothing. but i hope not.

today was a good day, got up late, i should have gone south to fix a caravan park pc but one of the other techs kindly agreed to go instead. so it was a very cruisy morning then off to soccer.

we played ok, but really let them run all over us in the first 10 minutes, during which time they scored 2 goals. the final score, 4-2, we lost. but we had fun and had a good run. first grade had a 1-1 draw. with about 5 mins to go the opposition got one up on us. and in the last minute we either got a penalty for a handball in their 18 yard box, or yet again, this referee has demonstrated is complete lack of a clue about the game. you know a referee is bad when both sides are heckling him no matter which way the free kick goes. really the reserve grade referee was better and should have done the main game. but i'm glad he didn't, the ref for 1st grade is a complete loser. our two players who insisted on arguing with the ref would have got cards instead of a warning.

a few minutes with ice on my shin/ankle, and then the call is too strong, come to me, come to me. and i'm up in their clubhouse having a few beers and doing loud abusive stupid heckling for our team. their team is just as good at this as us, so we all had a good giggle as well.

again, happy mother's day all you wonderful mothers. some of you have kids a bit young yet to be trained how to do this properly, but rest assured, as they get older they'll get the plot. a nice quiet sunday, if they must get up early they can keep the telly quiet. a cup of tea when you eventually wake up, and a general be good and don't be a pest. trust me kids, your mum will love it. a cuddle and some roses you stole from the neighbours garden (or in my brother's case, any bright looking flowers growing in anyone's garden)

no matter how snarky you think you are, these little grots love you. and for the dad's out there, make sure you coach them appropriately :-)


looks like i'm doing an 8:00am trip to save the grot's reputation by dropping off the present. hope they appreciate it.

Friday, May 07, 2004


the Drivel Warehouse is back. dunno what that page is for though. a couple of them that i read are on the link thingy, such as After Grog Blog and the Supermercado Project (yes i cheated, i just put it there). The others, that I can find, are Bitchin' Monaro Guide to Politics and the scrapbook.

some are still looking a bit sketchy (or perhaps my kooky browser is parked in jutland parade) but we'll be watching and waiting :-)

for a while it looked like the Gravett evil empire was going to make another step forward in it's quest for blogosphere domination. Yobbo was the last to go ;-) who will be next?

Thursday, May 06, 2004

wog ball for old people

finally the big day is here. my first game of over 35's soccer (or wog ball for you league/union/afl people, and football if my sister is reading from the yuk).

i'm a little nervous. i don't want to stuff up. these guys are all ex-first grade players, but old enough supposedly that they don't need to be fit because they've got skill. although one of the other guys told me he got hacked more times in his first game of over 35's than he did in the whole previous year playing grade. so i'm sitting here icing up my damned leg _before_ the game so it won't let me down. although i'm sure i'll be back in the same position after the game. only with a beer or two to keep me company. hmmmmm beeeerrrrrrr

but that's ok, i've told them i'm crap. i'm someone who needs to be fit to make up for a lack of skill. pity i'm not fit either. and also this means i don't have to go to training tomorrow night, because i'm be recuperating for our game on saturday :-) the side we are playing has the coolest clubhouse, and beer. so with a bit of luck we might kick on for a few afterwards. (thats soccer talk for have a few beers in case that didn't translate properly). failing that we'll be at the local celebrating our win or loss anyway.

today's idle bit of foolishness:
picking up my car from my brother's house. i get there and the driver's window is down. no problems, their cats probably won't get in there, unlike my sister's long haired, white, feral monster. so i get the keys off my sister in law and start to drive out the driveway, only to be mugged by their black cat on it's way over me out the window. fucken stupid cat!!!!
i look out the window to see my sister-in-law laughing hysterically.


now that was fucken fun. ok, yes, i am the worst player there, out of both sides.

we ran all over the place like lunatics, ran into each other, over each other and generally failed to score a goal. and then afterwards, everyone hangs around and has a beer, or two, or three. i am riding down my pushbike for the next game. screw getting fit, i'm gonna have a few beers afterwards.

we lost 2-0, we had about 3 quadrillion shots, and 2 of them bounced off the goalposts, the rest ended up everywhere except for in the creek. when i wasn't trying to get my breath back from running i was laughing at the antics, or swearing because yet again someone has given me the ball and i've kicked it to the bloody opposition. oh well.

relics wog ball. i highly recommend it :-)

from thefreedictionary.com

Relics can be:
the pluralized form of Relic meaning artifact
Relics is also the title of a compilation of rare and previously unreleased recordings by Pink Floyd

Wednesday, May 05, 2004

hump day not exactly to plan

went for a surf after work in an attempt to let it all go and unscrew my head. the surf wasn't that big, but there's always an interesting rip where i went, and i got the shit beat out of me. not the best preparation for soccer training. but ok for taking my mind of stuff. nice red full moon rising as i got out.

soccer training started out fairly hard. the little shits were running all over me even worse than usual. that's it. no more surfing before training, and i definitely have to work out a few more beer free days and get myself fitter. pity i have all the restraint of a 3 year old. now, yet again, i'm sitting with one leg up and a frikken ice pack keeping me company.

round to mum's afterwards to find that grandma is going just fine. they're thinking up ways to prevent her cooking herself. i just want to lock a few windows partially open, but that isn't feasible apparently. mum just wants to nick her gas heater and make her run airconditioning all the time (on reverse) for warmth, so she gets the heat, but still circulation. the gas heater is nice for standing in front of, but it uses up the oxygen in the room (and all the other doors are shut) and makes it very hot and stuffy.

anyway, i'm glad all that i was worrying about was for naught.

Tuesday, May 04, 2004


now i'm depressed. i've been on a high for months, i don't want to fall thru the cracks in the floor and end up in the dirt. i want more fun, for longer. no pain. no depression.

grandma had to go to hospital today. short of breath and a little distressed. last time she went it was some fluid on the lungs, a side effect of the flu or something, later they thought maybe another heart attack, just a mild one. perhaps again today. fucked if i know.

i don't think so though. maybe mum is right. the heater was on and all the doors were shut, dehydration and distress. she should be ok. i told my bro and sisters what's going on, like i was told. so i don't make them worry. i wasn't too worried. i thought she was ok. and i passed on exactly what i knew. it's not my business to filter info from my siblings. what i hear, they hear.

but now i'm feeling low. haven't felt it for a while and i don't like it. a combination of factors. a girl i'm interested in. maybe she's not interested. there's a few factors in my life that aren't working out the way i like, like my complete inability to handle money, debt etc... crap. when i was married i was a budget nazi, now i'm frikken hopeless. and grandma has yet again reminded me that she is mortal.

i find it hard to think of her as soft or vulnerable. hell, 3 days after having a triple heart bypass, she checked herself out of hospital (with her nurse daughter to look after her) and came to my goddamn wedding. she doesn't like hospitals it seems. i can relate to that. there's too many sick people in there.

and money again. gah!

and women. i seem to have terminally fucked up social skills. everything works out just wonderfully until i finally wake up and work out that i'm interested, or know that i'm interested and just wake up and work out that i'm in the game. she's talking to me. or even that a girl i've been interested in has agreed to go out to lunch with me. then i fuck it all up. (and no, haven't screwed up last situation. gotta give myself some kind of upper in the morning and wake up to myself)

yes, i'm feeling sorry for myself and having a sulk. i haven't screwed it all up yet. if i can unscrew myself from this funk then i'll be ok, no matter what. but i'm still down. perhaps the fucken high-o-meter has finally swung back around. i certainly hope not.

definition of getting old

won't stop playing sport, but you have a season ticket to the physiotherapist.

so i'm sitting here. trolling the blogosphere, with my left leg on the table beside me. my calf is wrapped in a compression bandage and i've got an ice pack from my ice pack collection on it.

do you know that ice packs work even better than ice for cooling beer? i've had a beer freeze in a little esky because it was wrapped in an ice pack. not as cool as this self chilling beer can though. could be very handy...

today was another boring day in the rabbit warren. finally got some more m$-isa-server shit sorted out. hopefully in another 2 days i'll be shot of the frikken lot. well apart from the usual bits where i didn't get it right the first time and have to go back and re-do it. but after our programming section's latest offering of crap and the month since troubleshooting it, i feel calm and relaxed about making a shit-load of mistakes and basking in their glory.

we had a lovely little session this afternoon in our team brief. basically we whinged and complained and blame-stormed (you know, put the blame elsewhere cause we can) for an hour and a half. ok, can we make a rule? whinge once. maybe twice. then either suggest a solution, or shutup. sure, there's trouble and stuff doesn't work. welcome to the world of computers.

i left before the end because i had to pick up grot D from the universal kid drop off point (yes mcdonalds), and go surfing hehehehe. unfortunately we were only in the water for half an hour before the sun was gone, the clouds were pink and the full moon was up. no waves though, well stuff all. yesterday was more fun, but still today was a fun experience.

me: ok grot, the next wave, take to the beach ok?
grot: sure
10 mins later....
me: maybe we should paddle in a bit

Sunday, May 02, 2004

100 books

being the slack bum that i am, i can't be bothered of thinking of anything new. so i've ripped this off from James

what is a "meme" anyway? and yes i am a philistine (note the 1 "L". i had to look it up in a dictionary, which unfortunately doesn't have "meme" in it)

books read have been bolded, books started and stopped due to general lack of interest have an asterix

1984, George Orwell
The Alchemist, Paulo Coelho
Alice's Adventures In Wonderland, Lewis Carroll
Animal Farm, George Orwell
Anna Karenina, Leo Tolstoy
Anne Of Green Gables, LM Montgomery
Artemis Fowl, Eoin Colfer
The BFG, Roald Dahl
Birdsong, Sebastian Faulks
Black Beauty, Anna Sewell
Bleak House, Charles Dickens
Brave New World, Aldous Huxley
Brideshead Revisited, Evelyn Waugh
Bridget Jones's Diary, Helen Fielding
Captain Corelli's Mandolin, Louis de Bernieres
Catch 22, Joseph Heller
The Catcher In The Rye, JD Salinger
Charlie And The Chocolate Factory, Roald Dahl
A Christmas Carol, Charles Dickens
The Clan Of The Cave Bear, Jean M Auel
Cold Comfort Farm, Stella Gibbons
The Colour Of Magic, Terry Pratchett
The Count Of Monte Cristo, Alexandre Dumas
Crime And Punishment, Fyodor Dostoevsky
David Copperfield, Charles Dickens
Double Act, Jacqueline Wilson
Dune, Frank Herbert
Emma, Jane Austen
Far From The Madding Crowd, Thomas Hardy
Girls In Love, Jacqueline Wilson
The God Of Small Things, Arundhati Roy
The Godfather, Mario Puzo
Gone With The Wind, Margaret Mitchell
Good Omens, Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman - sounds interesting
Goodnight Mister Tom, Michelle Magorian
Gormenghast, Mervyn Peake
The Grapes Of Wrath, John Steinbeck
Great Expectations, Charles Dickens
The Great Gatsby, F Scott Fitzgerald
Guards! Guards!, Terry Pratchett
Harry Potter And The Chamber Of Secrets, JK Rowling and yes i read the frikken things.
Harry Potter And The Goblet Of Fire, JK Rowling the first couple were ok,
Harry Potter And The Philosopher's Stone, JK Rowling
Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban, JK Rowling the last was crap
His Dark Materials trilogy, Philip Pullman
The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy, Douglas Adams
The Hobbit, JRR Tolkien
Holes, Louis Sachar
I Capture The Castle, Dodie Smith
Jane Eyre, Charlotte Bronte
Kane And Abel, Jeffrey Archer
Katherine, Anya Seton
The Lion, The Witch And The Wardrobe, CS Lewis
Little Women, Louisa May Alcott
Lord Of The Flies, William Golding
The Lord Of The Rings, JRR Tolkien
Love In The Time Of Cholera, Gabriel Garcia Marquez
The Magic Faraway Tree, Enid Blighton - and for the inevitable comment from my brother, garn get fucked!
Magician, Raymond E Feist
The Magus, John Fowles
Matilda, Roald Dahl
Memoirs Of A Geisha, Arthur Golden - where can i find this? *searches amazon.com*
Middlemarch, George Eliot
Midnight's Children, Salman Rushdie
Mort, Terry Pratchett
Night Watch, Terry Pratchett
Noughts And Crosses, Malorie Blackman
Of Mice And Men, John Steinbeck
On The Road, Jack Kerouac
One Hundred Years Of Solitude, Gabriel Garcia Marquez
Perfume, Patrick Suskind
Persuasion, Jane Austen
The Pillars Of The Earth, Ken Follett
A Prayer For Owen Meany, John Irving
Pride And Prejudice, Jane Austen
The Princess Diaries, Meg Cabot
The Ragged Trousered Philantrhopists, Robert Tressell
Rebecca, Daphne Du Maurier
The Secret Garden, Frances Hodgson Burnett
The Secret History, Donna Tartt
The Shell Seekers, Rosamunde Pilcher
The Stand, Stephen King
The Story Of Tracy Beaker, Jacqueline Wilson
A Suitable Boy, Vikram Seth
Swallows And Amazons, Arthur Ransome
A Tale Of Two Cities, Charles Dickens
Tess Of The D'urbervilles, Thomas Hardy
The Thorn Birds, Colleen McCollough
To Kill A Mockingbird, Harper Lee
A Town Like Alice, Nevil Shute
Treasure Island, Robert Louis Stevenson
The Twits, Roald Dahl
Ulysses, James Joyce
Vicky Angel, Jacqueline Wilson
War And Peace, Leo Tolstoy * - what a frikken drawn out book.
Watership Down, Richard Adams
The Wind In The Willows, Kenneth Grahame
Winnie-the-Pooh, AA Milne winne the shit :-)
The Woman In White, Wilkie Collins
Wuthering Heights, Emily Bronte

m$ isa-frikken-server, we hates it! we hates it forever!

ok, yes. it was my fault. one obscure little setting was wrong. it's just a nightmare of hidden configuration crap. i hate it.

if you are thinking of getting on the net and using a proxy server and firewall, whatever you do, don't use isa-frikken-server. actually don't even use a microsoft box. the stupidest things go wrong with them. and add to that some cryptic at best error messages, a support site with a deluge of crap that is rarely relevant (ok sometimes relevant) and you have the recipe for psychotic sys-admins.

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