Monday, April 26, 2004
more shit but different day
my latest interest has me spinning my wheels as usual. the initial attraction, a bit of banter and conversation. but i've burned my fingers so much over the last few years, i think i'm actually afraid to get further involved. and yes, for the psychologist i know who reads this, i never stopped loving my ex wife, but i accept the reality and am ok with the situation. the door is closed, and neither of us want to find the key.
so i'm going to do my normal shit and just wait and play a lot. go slow, don't over-reach your limitations. crap, that is so much shit. i'm interested but i don't know how interested, and i'm afraid of exposing myself to that again. but i totally love the bit where it works, where you can totally bare your emotions and be honest with someone, and you are stronger for it because you share so much ect...
i've been cooped up on a boat for the last 4 days, and unable to access the net as i would like (mobile phone internet access is not only expensive, but it really sucks) so here is some crap i wrote on the weekend, edited a bit to protect me from making an even bigger dick of myself.
this girl i'm interested in is pretty, but that is not what captures me. her lovely inquisitive blue eyes hold me spellbound. and her gorgeous smile stops me in my tracks. sometimes she touches me. and i am amazed that the touch of a relatively unfamiliar lady, is so comfortable and desirable. finally found what i look for in a woman!
in short, i think she is interested, and i think i am interested too. if i can keep from acting like an idiot for another few months and spend some quality time with her, that would be a good thing.
